she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I'm sobbing to NWA
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
