there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I deserve this hangover.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
