so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
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