What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
