who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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