i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
