problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
she peed on how many people?
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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