with your own penis?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Randomize