i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize