it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I wish i was in the wii world.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
