Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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