Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
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