also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
