Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
