i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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