They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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