i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
