is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
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