how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
