That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize