ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
You are a genius and a whore.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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