I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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