how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
