I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
