I like my sex mixed with concussions.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
