just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
