escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
