respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
