love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize
