is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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