did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
