ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
