I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Randomize
