I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
