Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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