she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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