I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Randomize
