Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
