we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
