Non-Jews are for practice
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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