Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I bet he comes in French.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
