I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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