The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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