i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
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