While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I lost the right to judge tonight
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize