she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
