There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Actions speak louder than pants.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
You can't just leave with hair like that
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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