that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
