Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Randomize
