WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
